Can you spot the many ways this is just simply wrong?
Not-so-intelligent design there, methinks…
Thanks to Stephen at The Politburo Diktat for “pointing out” the photo.
…it is a documentary.
If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.
-Henry J. Tillman
My former method of comment spam protection was blocking trackbacks as well, so even though I haven’t written much that is being linked to lately, I turned off the plugin that was keeping the spambots from posting. As a consequence, I’m getting comment spam again, but now some is more creative than I recall and at the least provides some entertainment value. Take this joke for instance (it’s borderline PG-13/R rated):
There was once a great actor who could no longer remember his lines. After many years he finds a theatre where they are prepared to give him a chance to shine again.
The director says, “This is the most important part, and it has only one line. You walk on to the stage at the opening carrying a rose. You hold the rose to your nose with just one finger and thumb, sniff the rose deeply and then say theline Ah, the sweet aroma of my mistress.�
The actor is thrilled. All day long before the play hes practicing his line over and over again.
Finally, the time came. The curtain went up, the actor walked onto the stage, and using just one finger he delivered the line, “Ah, the sweet aroma of my mistress.�
The theatre erupted, the audience was screaming with laughter and the director was steaming!
“You bloody fool!� he cried, “You have ruined me!�
The actor was bewildered, “What happened, did I forget my line?�
“No!� screamed the director. “You forgot the rose!�
This is just wrong…
Change is inevitable — except from a vending machine.
-Anonymous
Brothers and sisters, soon the truth will be revealed!
The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
All proceeds go to buying the holy pirate ship!
Technorati Tags: commentary, geek humor, humor
…irrelevant considering that the Star Trek franchise has been killed by producers who have no clue as to what created the original furor and fandom that lasted over 30 years, until following a formula for profits became far more important than good storytelling that overcomes the bad special effects and hokey premise ruined the dreams. From a post at a prior incarnation of Random Fate lost to the ether years ago until resurrected now:
One hundred reasons why Kirk is better than Picard
100. Kirk is a leader, not a follower.
99. Kirk never really got into that kinky “Jumpsuit” look.
98. Kirk has sex more than once a season.
97. One Word: Hair.
96. Another Word: Pretty-good-looking-can’t-see-the-weave-WIG.
95. Kirk can beat up a Klingon bare-handed.
94. Picard is a French man with an English accent.
93. Kirk would date Beverly Crusher — and damn the consequences!!
92. Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
91. Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
90. Kirk would personally throw Wesley off his bridge.
89. Two words: Shoulder Roll.
88. Kirk doesn’t wear dresses when admirals arrive for lunch.
87. Kirk once said: “I’ve got a belly-ache — and it’s a beauty.”
86. Kirk would never sing to children in a crisis.
85. Kirk can almost drive a stick shift.
84. Kirk, almost single-handedly, re-populated the Earth’s whale population.
83. Kirk says “Prime Directive? What Prime Directive?”
82. Kirk knows 20th Century curses.
81. Kirk was NEVER infiltrated by the Borg and used against the Federation.
80. Kirk ate little coloured cubes and still remained relatively healthy.
79. Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology.
78. Kirk never pretends to be a barber in order to gain a tactical advantage.
77. Kirk wasn’t shy about taking his shirt off –even around those pesky Yeomans.
76. Kirk would never waste a holodeck on something stupid like Dixon Hill.
75. Kirk never once stood up and had to straighten his shirt.
74. One Word: Velour.
73. Kirk can beat a Vulcan at Chess.
72. When Kirk was Picard’s age, he retired from Admiral and took to climbing rocks.
71. When Picard was 37, he was only Captain of the lowly freighter, Stargazer. When Kirk was 37, he was Captain of the flagship Enterprise.
70. Kirk liked a good belt of liquor every now and again.
69. One Word: Iman.
68. Kirk looks good with a ripped shirt.
67. If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he would rip off its head and shit down its neck.
66. Kirk says “Shoot first and wait for retaliation.”
65. Kirk’s first officer NEVER tells him to stay on the bridge.
64. Kirk never leaves the room to bawl somebody out.
63. Kirk doesn’t rely on the wisdom of some dumb old janitor to get him out of intergalactic scrapes.
62. Two Words: Funky Sideburns.
61. Kirk never asks his bartender for advice.
60. Kirk never once said “Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!”
59. Kirk is not politically correct.
58. Kirk never got “dumped” by a woman for an intergalactic busy body named after a letter of the alphabet.
57. Kirk never wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
56. If there was ever a Klingon on Kirk’s bridge, Kirk would likely be dead.
55. Ever hear of a bar shooter called “Make it so?” No? How about a “Beam me up Scotty” then? See the difference?
54. One Word: Miniskirts.
53. Kirk’s girlfriends always look good in soft light.
52. Kirk never went anywhere without a whole bunch of guys in red shirts.
51. Kirk’s first officer didn’t play some wimpy instrument like the trombone.
50. Kirk had more dates than his first officer.
49. The extent of Kirk’s knowledge of Klingon vocabulary can be roughly translated as “GO F*CK YOURSELF.”
48. If something doesn’t speak English — it’s toast.
47. Kirk wasn’t some prissy archaeology fan.
46. Picard’s middle name isn’t tough or awe-inspiring like Tiberius is.
45. If Kirk finds a strange spinning probe, he blows it up.
44. Picard never met Joan Collins.
43. Picard flunked his entrance exams to Starfleet.
42 Picard hasn’t fathered any children; Kirk — probably millions.
41. Kirk has a cool phaser — not some pansy Braun mix-master.
40. Two Words: Line Delivery.
39. Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes with his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay in Iowa to put himself through school.
38. Kirk emphasizes his orations with pertinent hand gestures.
37. Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate, charcoal and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his enemies. (Need we say more?)
36. Kirk is not put off by green skin.
35. Kirk knows how to deal with peace loving hippy goofs.
34. Kirk once fought a Greek god. And won.
33. Kirk barely asks for suggestions. And if he does, he asks Spock only.
32. Kirk doesn’t let the doctor tell him what to do.
31. One Word: Fisticuffs.
30. Kirk’s name is hated throughout the galaxy.
29. Kirk appreciates Shakespeare, but he doesn’t let it show.
28. You can never lock up Kirk for very long.
27. Kirk’s eulogies can actually make you cry.
26. Kirk plays god with lesser cultures, and then exploits them for resources.
25. Kirk’s son would never drop out to become a musician.
24. Kirk can climb up a Jeffries Tube and fix anything.
23. Kirk never hired an engineer with punk glasses.
22. The Klingons didn’t have a word for surrender — until they met Kirk.
21. Kirk’s bridge is not beige.
20. Two Words: Crane Shots.
19. Picard likes wimpy violin music — and coerces Data into playing it.
18. Picard allows cats on board, while Kirk beams away even really cute things, like Tribbles.
17. Kirk is a cultural icon — Picard is just some guy who’s really nice.
16. Kirk specifically ordered a swivel LA-Z-BOY for the bridge.
15. Kirk would never touch SYNTHAHOL.
14. Kirk looks distinguished in reading glasses — and nobody dares to call him”four eyes.”
13. Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon — easily.
12. Picard likes painting nudes, for art’s sake.
11. When Kirk doesn’t trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard doesn’t trust the Romulans, he gets fired at.
10. Kirk never once, ever, wore a wiener wrapping Speedo banana hammock on shore leave.
9. Kirk never gets his command codes locked out by some pimply acting ensign.
8. Kirk doesn’t test the engines — he just fires them up.
7. When Kirk says “Boldly Go,” he MEANS it.
6. Three Words: Flying Leg Kick
5. Picard’s crew would never ever think of him as a sexual object.
4. Kirk traveled through The Great Barrier, met God, and wasn’t even impressed.
3. Kirk’s bedroom is a passion pit with electric sheets.
2. Kirk would never let his Chief of Security wear a ponytail.
1. One Word: Balls
Technorati Tags: humor, Star Trek, random thoughts, Star Trek humor
It’s amazing how music and a wee change in editing can invert the tone of a movie preview:
Sleepless in Seattle as you’ve never seen it before…
Technorati Tags: humor
This is not kid-safe, nor is it appropriate for work, and you do need to have the volume up enough to hear, but this is one of the funniest movies I’ve seen in a while:
Technorati Tags: humor
What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?
-Marilyn Pittman
Technorati Tags: quotes, humor
Scott Adams (yes, that Scott Adams) at The Dilbert Blog dissects blogging “debate” based upon the results of his invitation to the readers of his blog to tell him why he is stupid.
I should have expected it, but Adams’ blog has quickly turned into one of the most amusing things I encounter on any given day.
