Earlier I wrote that I would post what my brother said at the funeral service for my Dad. Here it is, and although you can see the differences in philosophy of life between my brother and me, it is as I told him, I could not have said it better. He did our father proud.

My dad was the most selfless person I have ever known.

As I was growing up, my dad was the authority figure and the cornerstone of the family. As I reflect back, I realize all the sacrifices he made for us. As a father now, I appreciate all the little things that he did that I did not understand as a child.

I remember making pinewood derby cars when I was in Cub Scouts. Not only did he help me build the cars, but he explained to me why we did what we did. When it came time for me to help my son, he was there to remind me why we did what we did a long time ago.

As I look back, one thing that makes me smile, and those who know dad will understand, is when I was around 8 my dad took me to my first concert. It was a Village People concert….talk about a fish out of water. I realize what he must have been thinking, but there he was, as always.

I remember being concerned as I was about to become a father. My father was always practical and never showed much emotion, but as I saw him around my kids, I saw a side that was wonderful. There was always a gleam in his eyes when they were around. I saw him smile, play video and board games and be able to let his guard down and be a granddad. He always tried to be at their soccer games and halftime band shows.

As I grew older, my father and I became friends. I will remember the times at the Memphis football games and at the Tiger and Grizzlies basketball games. He never said anything when I would get overzealous. As a matter of fact, sometimes he would stand and yell as loud as me. I will remember him riding rides with me and my kids at the fair. I will remember him on the leap of faith waterslide at Atlantis in the Bahamas.

My father always put others needs in front of his own. He never liked dogs much but would always watch mine when my family would go out of town. Not just one dog mind you but ten dogs. Never complained or hesitated once. He accepted the responsibility of his family and never wavered from that responsibility. Even on Christmas eve at the hospital, he was letting us know what gifts still needed to be purchased. He thought of others first until the very end.

He also led the family till the very end. Before we left the hospital on Christmas eve, he called my brother and me to the bed and spoke as our father one last time. If it were not for random fate, I would not have understood why he said what he said. He was wise until the end. He never forgot or complained about the responsibilities associated with our family. Now those responsibilities fall to my brother and me, because his shoes are too big for either of us to fill alone.

Some feel that when you die, the reaper comes for you. I do not feel this way. I think God was ready for him to come home and he did. And knowing my father, when the gates of heaven were opened for him, he said, “I am sorry you had to go to the trouble of opening the gates for me, but thank you for doing it.??? The last thing I told my father was, “If when all is said and done, my children and family are half as proud of me as I am of you, then I will have done alright.

Many have asked over the past four days, “If there is anything I can do for you, let me know.??? Knowing my father, he would not want anything but I have one request. Once a day, more if you can, do something for someone else, without expecting something in return. Say something nice to someone because it is the right thing to do. Put someone else’s needs and wants in front of your own and encourage those you meet to do the same. Those who know me know I try to do this because that is what my father taught me to do. Talking to people last night at the visitation made me feel better knowing how many people he touched. In that, his spirit will live forever. Dad, you can now rest easy. Take the time to do what you want to do. I love you very much and look forward to seeing you again.

By Graham Grant, my brother