I will return to the United States from France on Monday, 5 December.

As I wrote earlier, I chose to go to France despite my father having been diagnosed with cancer two weeks before my departure because his prognosis appeared good. That situation has changed, and now I return to the US so I can be within a few hours travel time of my family if the need arises instead of over a day as it would be if I remained in France.

My choice 18 months ago was the right one for the time, and even looking back had more gains than losses, especially for one I respect and more so, love.

I do not leave France without a sense of loss, however. I have met many good people here, just as I have met many elsewhere in my life, and I will miss those in France as much as the others who have pieces of my heart. There are also many places I did not have time to visit, but those missed opportunities are nothing compared to the relationships between people.

We all have to make choices in our lives, and each choice involves both gain and loss.

I have often made choices that in retrospect seem to have sacrificed far more than won.

I know the choice I make now to return to the US is indeed for the best, and I do look forward to my return for reasons beyond the sad necessity which prompted it.

Unfortunately, this choice as all others cannot be made without a sense of loss.

Loss is part of what has been labeled by the literati as “the human condition” and perhaps they are right. Loss is a part of being human.

That recognition does nothing to relieve the painful void.

Learning to live with these holes in our hearts is one of the hardest lessons, one that is taught again with each choice in an encore both undesired and inevitable.

C’est la vie.

Technorati Tags: personal